Wedded Family Wednesday

Dear Monster,

   You have the most amazing extended family! Your aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents all love you so so much! I love that they are here to watch you grow and that they will be there for every single one of your big moments. You're a lucky little guy.
~~~
*Preface: I am going to use the pronouns "His" and "him" throughout this blog but please note that this information can be used on "his/him"s or "hers/her"s. :)

Hello readers! Today is all about the In-Laws. *insert scary dramatic music here* Just kidding, just kidding.  But it really is about the In-Laws. I'm sure all of you have heard the horror stories when it comes to all manner of In-Law. I can't even count the horror stories that I've heard. Some funny, some not so much. Most of the married or divorced women I know have at least one "horrible In-Law" story. Some still live it every day, some have resolved their issues, and others...well...there's a reason they're divorced.

Now readers, I will admit, I have had my fair share of In-Law issues. Oh boy, have I. I've screamed, cried, ignored, attacked, been passive-aggressive, been blunt. I've done it all. The good news is that somehow I made it to the other side. Yes, there is another side. While you're knee deep in confrontations and awkward moments it is hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel but it is there, if you work hard enough and have a hearty amount of patience.

About 3 years into the battle royale that was all of the issues between my In-Laws and I, I discovered the secret. Yes...there is one. The secret is as follows: When dealing with angry, belligerent, screaming, passive-aggressive, calm, "upset", "disappointed", judgmental, or just generally bad In-Laws you need to STOP. You need to stop yelling, emailing, texting, gossiping, back-talking, eye-rolling...Just STOP. Once you've stopped you need to REMEMBER. Remember that, before YOU, there was THEM. Before you were his #1, they were. They got to see first steps and first falls. They were there for first days of school and first fights with other students. They were there for the flu and for the birthday parties. They got to stand beside him when he felt he was "wronged" by his first boss, and they talked him through his first heart break. REMEMBER that, though you are now his whole world, at one point in time, you didn't even exist to this family. REMEMBER that, though you are now his heart walking around outside his body, his family remembers when his heart was safely in his chest and at no risk of being broken. They remember family camping, family vacations, family movie night, family dinners, family fights, and family hugs. They had this whole world that they were enjoying until YOU arrived. YOU are changing an ENTIRE family dynamic that, good or bad, has been in place for quite some time and that, good or bad, was probably "working" for everyone. After you have remembered all of that, it is time to LET IT GO. *Insert scratching record* I KNOW, I KNOW. There have been a lot of rude and hurtful comments, a lot of awkward moments, a LOT of anger. Things have not been great. But someone has to stop. Someone has to decide that enough is enough. Someone has to say, "You can do/say whatever you want, but I'm not going anywhere and I'm going to try to make everything work with everyone." Things can not go on like they have. It's just not healthy.

So:
1. Stop
2. Remember
3. Let it go

You are allowed to have some expectations. You are allowed to get upset if apologies aren't made in BOTH directions. You are aloud to expect some respect. But someone needs to start the process. Your significant other should, most definitely, be sticking up for you and attempting to engage his family in some sort of conversation. Steps need to be made in your defense! Because his family's defenses are on high alert they may be missing your good qualities, they be overlooking how happy you make him, they may be so absorbed in their fear and anger that they are probably missing some of your significant others' best moments. The best things you can do until everything starts to fall into a better place and forgiveness starts to set in are: be respectful, be kind, be understanding, and take A LOT of pictures. His family may one day be sad for all of the things they missed.

I believe that people deserve a wonderful relationship with their In-Laws. You should be able to look forward to giant family dinners and playing games before desert. You should be able to look forward to baby showers, birthdays, marriages, and family reunions. You shouldn't have to stress about every meeting with his family. You deserve a wonderful family life on both sides. But please remember that it takes work. Just like your marriage.

One last thing that you should always keep in the back of your mind when you are sitting in the bathroom pulling your hair out and taking those deep breathes so that you don't run into the dining room and start shouting like a maniac: They loved him first. You may love him to the very ends of the earth. You may be willing to die for him. You may give your ALL to his complete and utter happiness........................But they did it all first. You do it all now and I'm sure your significant other is an even more amazing and wonderful person for having you in their life, and you deserve some MAJOR props for that (*high five*). But remember that they had a pretty big part in making the person that you fell in love with. <3

Things are not always great for my In-Laws and I. We still have our moments of complete and utter disagreement. There are things on both sides that have been forgiven but may not ever be forgotten but we all know that we have my husband's absolute best interest at heart. I know his family makes him very happy and they know I make him very happy and, in the end, we push everything aside and let happy be happy. :) I am very lucky to have my additional brothers, sisters, Aunts, Uncles, Mother, and Fathers in my life. I am a stronger, more flexible, and more open person because of them all. It has been hard but the light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter everyday.

That is all for me on this lovely Wednesday! I hope that you have or will have a wonderful relationship with your In-Laws but if not: Stop, Remember, Let it go. Bye for now readers!




A special side note: Some people just can't be reasoned with. If you have tried EVERYTHING, if you are at the end of your rope, if your In-Laws are just flat out crazy and nothing can be done: It's okay. At least you tried. :)

Family update

Dear Monster,

   You are growing up so fast! I just can't take enough pictures or spend enough time just staring at you and hoping to slow time down. Soon you'll be crawling, then walking, then picking your own foods, picking your own clothes, starting school....AH! There just isn't enough time.
~~~

Hello readers!! Unfortunately, I don't have a Tempting Tuesday author for you today as I have been completely consumed by our last author, Tessa Dare. I am plowing through her books and completely drowning in her characters so, for today, it's just a simple family update. :)

A small update on me, I'm back to work full time and it is pretty much going how I thought it would, good and bad. I love my work, most of my co-workers, and most of the patients but I just can't wait to get home to my tiny family after work! It helps that our nanny is AMAZING! I came home from work yesterday and spent around 3 hours just hanging out and talking with Candice. It definitely helps me get through the work day when I feel that I have a friend at home watching my little monster.

Speaking of Liam, he is hitting some MAJOR developmental milestones! He is loving his solid foods (now that we have started adding some extra fiber), and he is babbling away like it's his job. This kid has got a pair of lungs on him and, oh man, does he know how to use them. He has what we call "low monster" days and "high monster" days. "High" or "Low" are decided by which range of his voice he decides to use that day. He has also started making "R2D2" sounds. These are very high and tend to consist of "beep boop beep" noises. He just cracks me up all day! On top of the talking and eating he has also started:

Playing with his feet-

And grabbing toys while he's on his tummy:

According to Liam's physical therapist, he is around 5 months old developmentally. He is, actually, almost 7 months. That still means that Liam is only 2 months behind in his development instead of the 2 1/2 months behind that he has been so far. Considering that he was born 2 1/2 months early, Liam is actually ahead of where he would have been had he been born on time. It sounds confusing but it just means that Liam is doing just fine, if not better than he should be. 

Sean is doing well. We're looking forward to a possible promotion for him at work! It would mean he would be back to having his own vehicle (a VAN this time!!), a little more moola around the house, and setting his own days off. Right now things are kind of frustrating because our whole life is based around Sean's partner's schedule. Gah! It is what we have to do to make things work and it isn't all that bad but we are definitely looking forward to when we have our own schedule back. I am working on getting Sean to get back to writing but, as some of you writers may know, you have to be in the right mind set for that creativity to flow and right now it is all about our tiny man, work, and getting by from week to week. Things aren't bad at all but it takes a while to really settle into this new life as parents. Every single second of our day is now different, every decision we make is now loaded, and our responsibilities have grown 100x! So, if you miss his writing, give him a nudge and let him know. I'm sure he'd love to hear from you.

In April we will be taking a giant vacation! I am so nervous about it. So far, we have not taken Liam on a vacation that is longer than 4 days and that was just over an hour away to my Mom's house. We will be traveling with him for 7 days on this upcoming trip and it will be to the other side of Colorado! Ah! (Obviously someone will be watching our house and animals as we can't bring them all along. Ha Ha!) We will be staying with one of my best friends, Liam's Auntie Angela, and visiting friends and family while we are over there so I know it will be an amazing trip. It's just a little nerve wracking thinking of being away from our home and our routine for such a long time! I will have a giant update when we get back, of course but for a week around Easter I, most likely, won't be blogging. :(

I hope everyone is having a Happy Tuesday! It has been so sunny and beautiful here in Denver that walks and times outdoors have become regular things for our little family. What have you been doing with all of this wonderful weather?? Any big trips planned for you soon?

Dad and Monster

Dear Monster, 

   I always knew you would have an amazing Daddy, I just didn't realize HOW amazing. I hope, with every particle of my being, that someday you will be able look passed all of the tough lessons that your Dad will have to teach you and all of the things that he will encourage you do (even though you think they're ridiculous) and appreciate what an honorable, kind, and generally good man he is. I hope that you want to be just like him some day.

~~~

Hello readers and Happy St. Patrick's Day! In honor of this lovely Irish holiday, my post will be in GREEN! Woo! Tonight I will be ATTEMPTING to make my husband one of his favorite Irish dishes for dinner! I'll let you know how it goes. It could, very easily, become a disaster. ha ha ha.

Speaking of my wonderful husband, I thought I'd let you know a little bit about him and how great he is. *Insert cheesy grin here* 

I love the concept of seeing something in a brand new light. Whether it's a decorative lamp that just needed a little something something and now it just MAKES the room, a car that looks brand new and amazing after you do a little vacuuming and some Armor All, or a person who is put into a different position and shines like a brand new penny. I just love seeing people or things bloom into something greater than ever before. I have been lucky enough to watch this process in my husband. I've been able to watch him go from a nervous boyfriend to a confident fiance to an attentive husband. All of these steps and progressions were so much fun! He's not one to change who he is but he adapts his personality and morals to new situations like a champ. Recently, I have been able to watch him become the most awe-inspiring father in the world! I count my blessings everyday that my husband has this capability in him, that he so naturally turned this "kick ass Dad" switch on and he just thrives in his new roll. I am one lucky Momma. I know he could have just as easily become negligent or resentful of Liam and I. He definitely had the opportunities. Between the bed rest, the specialists, my hospital stay, Liam's hospital stay, and everything else that comes with having a tiny monster take over your life, Sean has had his hands full. But instead of fighting with me and running the other direction, my husband works harder, does more, and asks for less. I don't know where his giant reserves of patience, understanding, and energy in general come from but I know I would not have made it this far without him. So, here's to all of the significant others out there that have been a real partner, a real team member, a real support system, and a real friend through some of the hardest times. *CHEERS*

Super Pregnant and on hospitalized bed rest. Bleh.

First time holding his baby boy

Little hand

Kangaroo Care

Try to ignore the pink/purple hat lol The nurses said it was the smallest they had.

First Bath!

First time with Dad and the bottle.

Calming down for Daddy.

First day at home.

Family love. <3

Chomping on Dad's fingers.

First time in our Jeep carrier!

Matching Daddy with his long sleeves.

Happy Birthday Daddy!

Climbing Dad

Figuring out how to giggle.

Learning about his bottle.

Daddy and Monster

Dancing with dad.

It's strange to look back on the pictures of Liam's first few months of life. Looking at him now it's almost impossible to imagine him being so small. He could barely wrap his hand around Dad's finger! I love sorting through all of the pictures of Sean and Liam. Everyday Liam looks more like his Daddy and I can't wait to be the observer of so many precious Daddy and Monster moments as our lives go on and we grow. I have a pretty awesome little family here. :)

Do you have anyone in your life that you've gotten to observe as they made a major life change? Did you recently revamp something in your life? Tell me your story!

*Side Note: Sorry for the lack of posts lately readers. This was my first week back to work full-time! Pretty intense week. I'm working on a better time management regimen so, hopefully, posts will increase here shortly! Thanks for being so patient and loyal!

Seperation Anxiety, Constipation, Nannies, and Other Things They Never Warn You About...

Dear Monster,

   I love you son. I REALLY do. But all of the things that are involved in raising you can truly be exhausting sometimes. Just exhausting.
~~~

"There are times when parenthood seems like nothing but feeding the mouth that bites you."

-Peter De Vries

This week has been one of those weeks. Not that Liam is actually biting me but, no matter what I do, something else goes wrong! I just can't seem to get to the top of this mountain. But, I've heard that there is no top to this mountain called Parenthood so I'm going to try to stay positive while climbing. :) But first...how about some good old-fashioned venting?

Let's start at the beginning shall we? Separation Anxiety. Pediatricians, Child Psychologists, and Infant Physical Therapists will tell you that it is a normal developmental stage. That it normally starts around six months of age and will continue until they are around one year old. It consists of your child slowly remembering your face and recognizing that you provide for them and that the things you provide for them make them happy...then it sets in that you leave them for short bursts of time. This comes with the realization that for that short burst of time you are not there to entertain, feed, or hold them. This does NOT make for a happy baby and MAN do they let you know about it! Liam's Physical Therapist was especially happy when she saw that he hit this stage. Mommy is not quite as excited. I have not been able to put this child down. AT ALL! When I do, within one minute, I have a sniffling, fussing, and sometimes full-on crying baby. If I am not in his face playing, feeding, burping, cuddling, or just generally talking to him, there is trouble. I'm not talking about setting him down and leaving the room for several hours or ignoring him for extended periods of time. I'm talking, "Mommy needs to pee...please don't cry...please just don't...(insert Liam crying)...DANG IT!". This is insanity! He lets Daddy play video games, make lunch, mix bottles, do chores, etc., but I try ONE thing and it is the END of the world. *sigh* I just keep reminding myself that this too shall pass. This too shall pass...................this too shall pass. Please...?

Moving right along to constipation. I mean, REALLY?? It happens to 90% of babies who are in the process of introducing or full on switching to solid foods and NO ONE TOLD ME??? NO ONE?? Not one person was like, "Hey, it's gonna happen. Throw a little extra fiber in his diet and you'll be a-okay."? Instead I have to find out post-constipation when it is a long and ridiculous road back to regulation for Liam? Gah! We have been struggling through his constipation for WEEKS! And because he was gun shy about gas pain and general constipation discomfort he went from eating 6oz at every feeding to barely forcing himself to eat 3oz at every feeding. This is NOT OKAY for a child who needs each and every ounce so that he can squeak by on his growth percentiles. So, after speaking with Liam's Pediatrician and a fellow Mommy at work who told me that her daughter had chronic constipation issues, we went out to Target (WOO!) and bought some Target brand Metamucil which we will be mixing in with his formula and solid foods. So, now we're crossing our fingers and hoping for the best. Our poor Monster. :(

How about some Nanny issues? I've got those too! After talking, talking, talking, debating, debating, debating, and going over and over our budget, we decided that I should go back to work full-time and that we should hire a Nanny. Then after crying and talking more and apologizing to Liam and going back and forth and back and forth about our "final" decision I finally asked around for help with finding a Nanny and, though so many wonderful people made such valiant efforts on our behalf, we ended up needing to go onto Care.com. For those of you that have never heard of this site, it is fantastic! You can find all different levels of care providers, post your profile as either needing a care provider or being a care provider, and browse profiles of people who show interest in helping you by sending you a message. Then, after paying a hefty $45/month, you can message back and forth with employees or employers, check basic level background checks and reviews, and eventually connect with someone you think would be right for you or your family. We thought we had found that person in, let's call her, "Jane". "Jane" was an energetic, bouncy, enthusiastic college student who had open availability and a willingness to learn. We did an interview with her, she seemed very pleasant, said that the pay and hours would be lovely, and stated that she was ready to start asap! Wonderful! Well, here comes her first training day and the first thing she says to my husband is, "After reassessing everything, I won't be able to stay here in Lakewood after May. I will be moving back to Longmont." REALLY???? On her profile she states that her expected pay scale is from $5-10/hr and that she would be fine with part time. We were planning on paying her on the higher end of that scale and giving her up to 40 hours every 2 weeks! WTF? Maybe you should change your requirements on your profile and assess your situation BEFORE your first day of training...?? But whatever. So we start panicking but we continue to pay and train "Jane" just in case we weren't able to find someone right away. Then, BAM, welcome to our world Miss Candice! She loves Liam, she shares our same values and beliefs on raising children, she has a 100% open schedule, and she loves Ninja Turtles...I mean, come on. I guess everything happens for a reason and "Jane" can just go..........be somewhere else. ;)

Oh the whole wide world of things that they NEVER warn you about when they decide to write those stupid parenting books. Like how even though Liam will cry and fuss at me ALL day, if he smiles just once I forget everything and somehow am able to smile right back. Or how your whole life will brighten up when your child finally starts feeling better after being sick or uncomfortable. They definitely don't tell you about the emotional roller coaster that is involved with leaving your child with someone that is still (even after background checks, interviews, and training days), technically, a stranger (and hoping the entire time that they are not currently crossing the American-Mexican border with your child). Sean and I are going to write our own book on parenting, The Lies Called Pregnancy and Parenting.

That's it for me tonight readers. Sorry about the rants. It has been such a frustrating week and I think I just need a nap and a glass of wine. ;) Happy Friday to everyone!

*** Since we both had awful weeks and dealt with them like the awesome woman warriors that we are, I thought I'd send some major props to my good friend, Miss Alyssa, over at In The Land of Lou. Read through her blog Perspective. That woman has WAY more positive mind power than I. Much love. :::chest pound, weird hand symbol, kiss the "peace sign" fingers, point to the sky:::

Payday Friday #4

Dear Monster,

   One of the first things that I was excited to buy for you was SHOES! Seeing all of the little Converse and hiking shoes just made we want to jump up and down with excitement...I think I actually did a couple of times (much to your father's chagrin). Since then, obviously, other purchases for you have excited me (i.e. food, toys, clothes, binkies, bottles, spoons...okay, pretty much everything) but nothing will ever feel the same as when I first realized that I could start buying you little shoes because you were ACTUALLY going to be joining our lives.
~~~

Hello hello hello Readers and TGIF! WOO! It's finally Payday Friday and have I got a fun product for you! :D Today's product was brought to my attention by Liam's Auntie Angela! This woman is amazing...for so very very many reasons. She jumped up and down with me like a fool (over the phone) when I told her I was pregnant, she sat with me while I was pregnant and on bed rest (and never even let on that she was bored out of her mind ;), she went SO FAR above and beyond for Liam's Star Wars themed baby shower, and she dipped out of a meeting to show me some love when I called her to freak out on the day that Liam was born. All of these things paint the picture of an amazing and wonderful woman and I love her for it all but the day that I KNEW that I would love her forever was the day that I received these from her for my son:

I freaking LOVE these shoes. They gave Angela the perfect way to show that she knew us, she knew Liam, and that she was excited for us and all of our new adventure as a little family. Liam wears them every time we leave the house! They are easy to get on, super stylish (for a nerd's child anyway), they keep his freaking socks on, and they are not easily kicked off! Liam is a sock Houdini so any shoe that helps remedy said Houdini-ism is a winner in my mind. I love these shoes so much that I just had to find out what they were about and where they came from.

These gifts from God are called Robeez. They come in styles for boys and girls and they size appropriately for newborns, creepy crawlers, and walkers! They top out at around 4 years old. They have Sesame Street characters, Star Was characters, the standard monkeys, kitties, bears, and lions, and they have dressier styled shoes as well. They are designed around the idea of mimicking bare feet and supporting the growth of tiny feet, not constricting them. By promoting balance, growth, and protection of little tooties the Robeez company has created a unique and wonderful product.

The Robeez Company has three main variations of their wonderful shoes:

• Robeez Soft Soles (which Liam has)- designed to stay on and keep feet happy, ideal for everyday wear
• Ages: 0-4
• Stages: Kicking, crawling, cruising, walking
• Activities: Indoor & light outdoor use, pre-school/daycare, gymnastics/dance
• Easy on/Stays on: Elasticized ankle design assures they stay on
• Durable Comfort: High quality leather and materials for both comfort and durability
• Skid-resistant Sole: Textured suede sole prevents slipping
• Great for foot development: Soft, flexible sole
• Robeez Mini Shoez- have a stylish "real shoe" look which make these the perfect compliment to any outfit. Comfort never looked so good
• Ages: 3-18 months
• Stages: crawling, kicking, cruising, beginner walker
• Activities: Special occasions, play on the driveway, playgroup, daycare
• Easy on/Stays on: Elasticized back AND adjustable fastener
• Premium Quality: High quality leather and materials with detailed finishing
• Water-Repellant Sole: Non-slip sole perfect for indoor and outdoor wear
• Comfortable: Flexible sole and cushioned foam insole
• Robeez Eco Collection- made from premium "green" materials with careful attention to their impact on the environment. Available in Soft Soles and 1st Stepz.
• Lining: Naturally tanner leather
• Printing: Water Soluble Inks 
• Outsole: Naturally tanner suede
• Upper Canvas: 100% organic cotton canvas

So far, Sean and I have only tried the Soft Soles but I can't WAIT to try the other variations. I'm especially excited for the Oscar the Grouch winter boots for next year!

That about wraps it up for Payday Friday! I hope you look into using these awesome little shoes for your own kiddo or as a unique and personal gift for someone else. :) If you're not racing over to buy the shoes, what ARE you doing for Payday Friday? Got any big, strange, or completely normal purchases planned for today? Are you finally going to be able to buy something you've been saving up for? If not, how far away are you from that dream purchase?

Have a great day everyone and TGIF! :D